In a perfect world, every thing would always go smoothly. Everything you set forth in motion would follow through as planned. But this is reality and when you’re dealing with eldercare….nothing is set in stone.
Since my sister has had the added responsibility of caring for her mother-in-law, I’ve taken over our parents’ affairs more heavily. While things have been fairly smooth over the past couple of months there have been some bumps along the way, especially the last couple of weeks. From finding the oxygen levels changed to seeing redness on my mom’s face…….we’ve been scrutinizing our home help more closely. There seems to be tension between them that I’ve tried to quelch with a meeting last month. However, I don’t know if my words have fallen on deaf ears or things are just not working out.
Rather than get into the really personal details of our story, I have to say that unless you yourself are overseeing your parents. (Which we already did for 3 years)…..having outside help in the form of volunteers, paid help or agencies aren’t going to guarantee you 100% peace of mind. You go into it, hoping for the best but expecting the worse….and so far, I’m not happy with the way things are going lately. I’ve had to make an appointment with ADT security so that I can monitor things via camera. I know this is something we should have done any way. If you are thinking of hiring in-home help or having people come in to help you out…regardless if it’s family or strangers, a camera is a good thing…..
It’s not that I suspect abuse….but I’m getting tired of the finger pointing…….our #1 goal is our parents’ safety and health…and whether it’s intentional or neglect, I have to make sure by seeing things for myself….and not just with that…but making sure that there is peace in the house…which means seeing that there is no conflict in any form. I already visit my parents 2-3 times a week but obviously not there for 24 hours. So , I cannot see all that is going on. Unfortunately, my patience is running thin…I don’t want to make any drastic choices but may have to if things don’t change and continue on the path that they’ve been on….but for sure 2010 is not going to repeat our problems of 2009. Raising a 3 year old as a full-time parent and home based business owner is difficult enough to deal with “drama”. So I will leave it at that.
