
- Image by herwordskill via Flickr
When I was young, I had some anger issues and very low self esteem. I attended a Catholic school during my elementary and junior high school years and had a problem with authority. I got into some trouble with teachers and was placed on detention and suspended once at the end of junior high. My first year of high school was spent at a Seventh Day Adventist school and during my freshman year, I got into a fight with a boy who was bullying a friend of mine and myself. I have no problems with religious institutions but at the time, I felt they were very repressive and I was frustrated all the time. Instead of tunneling my anger into more positive activities, I allowed this bully to get to me so much so that I reacted physically. Both of us were on the verge of suspension, however, considering we were both 1st time offenders and I happened to be on the Principal’s honor roll at the time, they gave me a 2nd chance and let him off with a warning. We avoided each other the rest of the school year. Unfortunately, the staff wasn’t very helpful to me as far as trying to help me. So, here I was, still frustrated and feeling resentful towards the school for not doing more for me.
My family was like any other normal family, but unfortunately, my parents argued a lot and so did many other members of my family. There was no physical abuse, but there was a lot of yelling which wasn’t healthy either. I think in many ways that affected me a great deal.
With as much respect as I have for both of my parents, I think that I was too much to handle for them at the time. I don’t know if it was a cultural difference or because they were much older when I came to age. Nevertheless, they didn’t know how to handle me. My mom was basically raising me by herself because my dad was planning on retiring from Pacific Gas and Electric in the San Francisco Bay Area. His plan was to move down to San Diego after I finished high school to retire. He would fly every month to visit, but it was mostly my mom and I. (All of my brothers and sisters were grown). Fortunately for me, Josie and my late brother-in-law Mark were worried about my mom handling me on her own and asked me to move back up north to the Bay Area to see if I could thrive better there. I did! I became a companion/mentor to my young niece and I fared better at a public school where I felt more accepted. My grades were excellent and I stayed on the honor roll my remaining 3 years before I set off to the University of Washington.
What was the difference? Living in a stable household was what did it for me. I think the small town atmosphere of Livermore, California was another. It was quiet. People were very friendly and my classmates all knew each other since they were small children. I love my mom but I was too much for her.
The Problems
I was lucky that someone noticed. Many teens are not. More often than not, teen emotional problems go unnoticed by unsuspecting adults. Problems like mine are probably not all that uncommon but many other teens go through far worse problems and sometimes serious mental conditions. Teens who are victims of violence or witnesses to it tend to exhibit more problems.
Some of the symptoms include:
- Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
- Clinical Depression
- General Anxiety Disorders
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